Raising kids without enough funds

I am 20 years old, and I have a boyfriend. We have two children together, and another is on the way. We are living together. Both of us are working, but when we put our money together, it is not much.

When I got pregnant with my first child, I did not wait for my parents to tell me to leave their house. I put my little belongings together and told my parents that I was leaving. That was when they found out that I was pregnant.

When I told my father I was leaving, he asked where I was going, and I told him that I was pregnant. He said that if things didn't work out with my boyfriend, I could not come back to his house because he did not expect me to be having sex with a man who cannot help himself much.

I moved in with my boyfriend, and the rent was not very expensive. It was only $12,000 per month. However, when the landlord saw that my boyfriend had brought in a woman, he told him that he would have to pay $5,000 more because he had rented him the place as a single man. The rent included water charges, and we contributed to the electricity bill.

My boyfriend is 25, and he drives for a company. The landlord suffered a stroke, and my boyfriend has been able to help him by using the vehicle to take him around.

This man has two children, but they are not living in Jamaica. We have gotten to know them very well, and they are very good to us. This man's wife is not well either. So my boyfriend and I have been taking care of them. Their children told us that we do not have to pay that amount of rent for the place because we have been so good to their parents.

My mother helps me with my children. She comes to the house and stays with them until I get home from work daily.

My landlord's children pay for someone to take care of their parents. She cooks, cleans, and washes for them.

My children's father and I would love to get married, but we would like to find somewhere that is more convenient. My children's father also wants a better job.

This man's children told us that when their parents have passed on, they will sell the house. They are even thinking about putting their parents in a nursing home, but their parents are resisting that. This is an old house, but if they were to give up this house, we would purchase it and refurbish it. My father is a builder, and he has promised to help us.

F

Dear F.,

You have a good landlord. I am sorry to hear that he and his wife are not well these days. Their children are very thankful for the help that you are giving to their parents. They are not pressuring you for anything, so I want to encourage you to do your best for these people.

In the meantime, try to save as much as you can so you will be in a position to purchase the house if they sell it. At the same time, you would also have enough to make a down payment on another place.

I cannot tell you how to run your life, but you should not foolishly have children. You should only have a number of children that you can adequately support. So be careful how you plan your family and the number of children you will have.

I wish you well in everything you do.

Pastor